We want our children to build good smartphone habits so that as they grow into the adult world, they are in control of their device and not the other way around. But growing good smartphone habits is hard work, exhausting and can be lonely. So, we have created three categories to help us manage their smartphone usage and time. We are also regularly talking about their smartphone habits with them, keeping an open conversation about when, where and why. Here are our 5 Ways for Kids to Build Good Smartphone Habits.
Read our Build Smartphone Habits story here.
Our Good Smartphone Habits that Every Family Needs to Know
1. Preparing for the Future
Smartphones are everywhere. And how we use smartphones in our day-to-day life is constantly changing. And we are being encouraged constantly to build, grow and maintain healthy smartphone habits to improve social well-being, mental health, sleep – the list goes on. And as adults, its really hard to get right.
So how are we going to prepare our children for this smartphone crazy world? In this post I have split smartphone usage into three categories: Function, Fun and Social. This will help you decide how to manage and monitor your child’s smartphone usage but also to build good habits around how, where and when smartphones are used.
2. Phone Function
There are loads of ways a smartphone is useful. Most parents give their children their first smartphone for their functional capabilities. They need access to a device so they can be contactable when out and about. They may need access to their pocket money app. They may want the option to buy their school bus ticket on an app. The list goes on.
So work out with your child which parts of their smartphone are for everyday life, functional and important. I suggest the following:
Messages / Phone-calls to parents/carers
Pocket Money app
Service Provider app to view bundles, credit etc
Any necessary travel apps
The list is actually quite simple. And the rules, boundaries around phone function is also quite simple. Use as necessary.
3. Phone Fun
This is where building good smartphone habits becomes tricky. This is where smartphones become addictive and hard to put away. Smartphones are fun to use. You can take pictures, videos and play games – all things that kids like to do.
Your child’s phone is kept in a communal area (not in their bedroom), thus easily supervised
Agree a time that they can be on their smartphone for fun and a time that they must get off
Don’t download any game apps on their first smartphone
Use smartphone parent tools to limit their ability to download apps without permission.
Use smartphone parent tools to impose time limits on phone fun areas of their phone but if possible put them for slightly longer than you have agreed with your child so they have the opportunity to learn putting the phone away without being told by you or the device.
Go through your family rules about taking pictures (including taking no pictures with nudity) and check their pictures regularly.
Secondly, start an open conversation with your child about building good smartphone habits when it comes to the fun stuff. How its hard to put smartphones down when you are having fun but sleep, food, social time, fresh air are all still vital to their well-being. That building strong, healthy phone fun habits is a life-skill that everyone has to learn and continue to learn throughout their lives.
Explain the boundaries that you have put around Phone Fun are for their protection and it’s your job as their parent to maintain and hold that boundary.
Most kids already have other devices that they can play games on so they can still have fun there.
4. Phone Social
Phone social is the one most parents dread. It’s social media, messaging apps, chatting with friends and potentially with strangers. It’s your child’s world growing bigger suddenly and it’s not always going to be that visible.
I like to use the image of children crossing the road for explaining phone social. Remember when they were toddlers and they wanted to cross the road on their own but you made them hold your hand because that was the only safe way for them to cross the road. Remember how they complained and threw tantrums but you but you held firm anyway because you could see the car coming.
Phone social is the car to your child. It’s racing down the road and if you don’t hold your child’s hand at the beginning and teach them how to engage with it safely, then they are going to get hurt.
So as grown-ups, we need to step up and take our kids hand’s again. We need to teach them how to cross the phone social road. We need to prepare them for the big phone social world in small baby steps, just like when we taught them to cross the road.
I suggest the following:
No phones in bedrooms
Going on phones to message, video-chat, social media scroll is done in the same room as a parent with a clear time limit. And a discussion of what phone social they will be engaging in.
No social media until at least age 13 if possible
5. Share Your Story...
Usually I encourage you to chat to other parents about their smartphone journey but children on smartphones is such a divisive subject that I actually think its more important to be talking to your child.
With an open conversation where both parties listen, compromise and engage, then children will be able to come to you when any of these smartphone categories is not working for them and you can safely adjust within the safe boundaries that you need to maintain.
Build Good Smartphone Habits
Before giving your child a new device, take a moment to plan and set boundaries. Here are a few helpful guides to get you started.
DISCLAIMER: The Lego Group of Companies does not sponsor, authorise or endorse this site.